Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Girls from New Jersey resemble trolls. I researched for several hours and decided that everything I've discovered was nothing more than low quality bullshit. Therefore, I've come up with my own concoction of high quality bullshit which gives you the exact reason on why 9/10 women from New Jersey look like trolls.

» Christopher Columbus finds New World.
A drunken sailor discovers the New world at 2:00 a.m. while aboard the Rodrigo de Triana, somewhere in the Bahamas. Even though Chinese people discovered America first, intoxicated Christopher created a huge scene about it at a world sailors meeting, thus leading to him getting credit.

» West Virginia.
In 1863 West Virginia decided not to be gay and become part of the United States. San Francisco is another story. While guys in white wigs talk about placing homosexual miners and farmers on their state flag, people continuously migrated from Europe to the newfound America. At the time, West Virginia's population was 78 people and 5,235 squirrels. Approximately 100 immigrants arrived at West Virginia. Ironically, no language barrier existed because the hicks and Europeans all sounded retarded to each other, which to them was the only language they knew anyway.

» Last resort to lonliness.
Since the population of West Virginia was a minute 178, mostly men, it was difficult to find someone to mate with that either you or someone you know hasn't already fucked. So... read the full story on http://www.twelvefifteen.com

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