I update almost daily.

This year's daily update.

2010-11-18T13:50:00.001-08:00

I usually update daily, but I spent the last two years practicing my Stanky Leg.

I neglected 2009. :(

Let's see how many search results I can get over a year for "naked pics of Benjamin Button."

One year.

2008-11-18T20:15:00.000-08:00

Ha. Did it! One year later.

Holy November

2007-11-18T08:54:00.000-08:00

Dammit. I forgot to update. Again.

britney spears sex tape

2006-11-15T05:28:00.000-08:00

I GOT THE VIDEO! britney spears sucking k-feds dick! HOT DAMN!

download it at http://www.twelvefifteen.net

2006-09-26T13:30:00.000-07:00

I've been killing people on Halo 2 lately. Come get your ass kicked. crankers dotorg is my gamer tag.

Here is just one of my recent games...31 kills, 5 deaths, click here to see my stats.

2006-09-21T10:47:00.000-07:00

Well damn! I'm back!

Of course, I forgot about this site again, for another few months. It always happens like that.

And even worse, all I'm here to tell you is to visit http://www.twelvefifteen.net.

Ok, off for another few months! See ya later!

2006-07-19T12:10:00.000-07:00

It's been months since I've written anything here. It will probably be months before I write something else.

At least I should let you all know that you should promptly go to TwelveFifteen.net (fight videos, free sex pictures and videos, gross pictures, funny stuff, and more) and 1215Babes.com (nothing but pure teen sex galleries and naked babes).

Go now, you won't be let down.

2006-01-10T19:21:00.000-08:00

Once again I forget I have a page on this site. Guess what, 5 months from now I might remember again! Great post eh? With all the Britney Spears sex tape talk, I have nothing else to say anyway.

2005-11-04T15:14:00.000-08:00

Woah yeah, Carolyn Murphy should have a sex tape released by Christmas. Add that to Paris Hilton, Janet Jackson, and others who are exposed celebrities.

Check out http://www.twelvefifteen.com

2005-10-05T09:09:00.000-07:00

I just found out how much women love my website. Click here to see for yourself!

2005-08-13T13:50:00.000-07:00

Strange dream I had last night...I'm a mile above ground, in a rain forrest, walking between trees on these square boards connected like a rope bridge. The scary part is that there is no rope, its more of a rubber band like material. Locals dressed in leaves and rags inhabit this place high above the ground and walk and run freely on the rubber band bridges without fear.

Me? I'm shitting my pants.

I take two steps and my feet feel like they're going to fall out from under me or lose balance.

One of the locals is hot as hell and a bit on the tan side. I don't know how she's tan, there's never enough sun to burn being under all those leaves. We're playing around and she's telling me not to be scared of the bridges. I see one line come undone and quickly reattach it to the post. Yeah, don't be scared of falling a mile to the ground, in the middle of a rainforrest? Ok. Sure.

I get her on her back and my face is near her ass because her legs are in the air. I'm about to give her what she's never had before and take a bite out of that pussy, but then I realize that she's probably NEVER shaved since she's a fucking tree-person. Not only that, but the only time they can shower is when it rains extra hard and enough makes it through the top section of leaves.

That leaves me in sort of a bind since I'm in this weird place and all I want to do is fuck the hot local with the hairy twat. Fuck it. Can't be picky.

Another dream I had was that I was in a school bathroom shitting my brains out and students were dropping things into the radiator. The radiator was above me on the next floor up, and things they dropped were falling on or next to me. They could even see me squatting if they looked hard enough. Somehow a strange exhaust pipe from a car fell through the radiator. It was hot as hell, but hit something that nearly froze it on the way down. I discovered some new hot-to-cold scientific discovery while taking a crap.

2005-08-09T19:29:00.000-07:00

Sunburn has returned and its not the fun it used to be; it hurts. Although, I'm addicted to peeling it off and that's probably a bit disturbing. Oh well. I bet most of you peel your skin off too, just like in grade school when you used to squirt a handful of Elmer's glue on your hands for the sole purpose of skinning it.

To hell with you if you don't enjoy peeling off your own dead skin!

2005-08-08T17:35:00.000-07:00

Peter Jennings died. I think the general population feels quite weird or upset about it because he was our main news personality for decades. He was feeding us news since before I was born. It's like he's everyones uncle or something...don't know.

On a lighter note, I was kicked off of myspace.com again. Why? I don't know. I think its because the pictures I posted had wet t-shirts in them, however that's a load of shit because there's girls in thongs with their starfish showing. I had nothing that bad. Whatever. I'll be back on there in no time.

2005-07-12T12:44:00.000-07:00

I just found pictures of Jessica Simpson naked.

Visit http://twelvefifteen.com/news.php?artc=244&

SHE IS HOT!

2005-05-22T09:23:00.000-07:00

Star Wars three sucked major donkey privates.

http://www.twelvefifteen.com/news.php?artc=207&

Read that. I'm sure you'll enjoy it.

TwelveFifteen.

2005-04-17T19:34:00.000-07:00

Jebus. I forgot I had this blog.

2004-12-26T07:49:00.000-08:00

http://www.twelvefifteen.com/images/deafhookers/sexsign003.jpg

That picture should be enough to keep you going.

See full list of pictures at http://www.twelvefifteen.com/wsnm/news.php?artc=55&

2004-09-17T01:26:00.000-07:00

Ladies, keep busy when football is on or else you'll never hear the end of it and your man will torture you by becoming the inconsiderate asshole who consistently urinates while the porcelain seat lies flat, leaves shavings in the sink, and uses all the best towels in the house. Do you, the girl who's supposed to support your man's habits and hobbies, wish to distract your man from the main thing that keeps him from cheating on you? No you don't.So ladies, what do you do to keep yourself busy while your guy watches football all Thursday/Monday nights and all day Sunday? Well there's tons of possibilities and I've gathered the best ones and here they are...Oh, that's right. Read the full story at the full site. http://www.twelvefifteen.com

thanks.

2004-08-03T10:34:00.000-07:00

I can't stand when I'm on the phone with a company who bills me (credit card, gas, electric, etc) and the first thing I hear is "press one to continue in English," "prensa dos a continuar en español." And it gets worse. I'll be at the mall or somewhere else in public, and I'll see signs in both English and Spanish. Helloooo! This is America, there shouldn't be any other language available besides our language.

Even worse than the automated operators and signs is the immigrant fucks who speak Spanish in public and teach their children how to speak that shitty useless language. Every time I hear some degenerate scumbag from Mexico speaking Spanish, I want to punch them in the face and choke the espanol out of them - man, woman, and children alike. If you move to another country and have children THERE, you should teach them the language that the country speaks so that your kids aren't fucked up in school and are wondering why they don't understand jack shit.Even way worse is the fact that you should read the full story at http://www.twelvefifteen.com

2004-07-28T12:30:00.000-07:00

Girls from New Jersey resemble trolls. I researched for several hours and decided that everything I've discovered was nothing more than low quality bullshit. Therefore, I've come up with my own concoction of high quality bullshit which gives you the exact reason on why 9/10 women from New Jersey look like trolls.

» Christopher Columbus finds New World.
A drunken sailor discovers the New world at 2:00 a.m. while aboard the Rodrigo de Triana, somewhere in the Bahamas. Even though Chinese people discovered America first, intoxicated Christopher created a huge scene about it at a world sailors meeting, thus leading to him getting credit.

» West Virginia.
In 1863 West Virginia decided not to be gay and become part of the United States. San Francisco is another story. While guys in white wigs talk about placing homosexual miners and farmers on their state flag, people continuously migrated from Europe to the newfound America. At the time, West Virginia's population was 78 people and 5,235 squirrels. Approximately 100 immigrants arrived at West Virginia. Ironically, no language barrier existed because the hicks and Europeans all sounded retarded to each other, which to them was the only language they knew anyway.

» Last resort to lonliness.
Since the population of West Virginia was a minute 178, mostly men, it was difficult to find someone to mate with that either you or someone you know hasn't already fucked. So... read the full story on http://www.twelvefifteen.com

2004-03-08T19:39:00.000-08:00

Guess which girls, or so-called models, currently do not have a modeling income to supplement their typical day job? TWO FAT GIRLS. And, I'm a nice guy, so I want to help two fat fucks find employment in the modeling workfield. But first, let me introduce and detail how I encountered the existence of these beasts formerly known as humans.

read full story at: http://www.twelvefifteen.com

2004-02-08T13:42:00.000-08:00

» Drugs are bad.

Pipes:
Marijuana, the essence of hippies, shitty rappers, and uneducated. A poormans substitute for upper class stimulants. Collegiate pussy enabler. And the reason why half of your friends have/will fail out of college because their minds are too far set back to comprehend the fact that they've become essentially useless. Even worse, is the fact that many of you haven't had your filthy gina lips on anything worth toking. Say hello to schwag.

Needles:
Heroin, built for corporate daughters, hookers, and pushers of disregard. Eventually the train derails and users wake up in rehab or next to mud and worms. Engineered for those who don't mind sharing needles with rebellious cuntal stains.

Pills:
Pain, ecstacy, and all of the above. Cosmetically designed pills designed to variably enhance human body exist for the sole reason that you want hugs - not drugs. "E" makes people dance to trance and dress likes its a neon plastic Halloween gone wrong. Pain meds ensure the typical American will feel more lazy than usual. Thank god for remote controls.

Powder:
Coke, rocks, socks, and destroyed thoughts mend the fact that the user has not recieved their money's worth. Another stupid drug designated for the white collar population and losers who hoard the cash they've earned selling pot - just to purchase another drug. Seems to be a favorite of ditzy blondes at medium sized colleges, but no one cares because it makes them more of a slut.

Dreams:
Magic mushrooms and acid create a dreamworld that's generally much better than the nightmarish reality humans are forced to experience. What better than to drive 90 on the freeway, staring at the skyline of your city, and realizing that Godzilla is destroying it. Later the user awakes in the uncomfortable mattress of a local hospital. The user is lucky to be alive, but they cry because they think that their so called friend Godzilla flipped their 96 Honda Accord out of anger. Hey, Godzilla has no friends.

My stimulant:
A keg of Miller Light, various liquors, and a fired up grill covered in heaps of manfood, and an abundance of shaved vag with nice racks.

A few things much cooler under the influence:

Counting the hair on a homeless womans upper lip.

Doing this to people.

Play erotic dress up.

Listening to these mp3s/watch the video.

Masturbating.

Watching the mysterious donuts.

Wondering about Ronald McDonald.

Wishing you were here.

Beating this.

Contemplating humanity and your life - this is the best of them all.

2004-02-02T17:08:00.000-08:00

» Janet Jackson's nasty nipple.

Uno: No one in the Milky Way cares about Super Bowl XXXVIII with the exception of clam chowder rejects who speak with the accent of hookers on heroin, and 85% retarded rednecks from the Carolinas - not exactly sure which Carolina the ~~pussies~~ Panthers represent, mostly because the moronic Carolina inhabitants don't know either.

Dos: Janet Jackson is almost as fugly as her alien-faced brother who's a child dick sucker by night, singer by day. Janet Jackson's superbowl halftime nipple resembles a miniature particle of excrement surrounded in a useless pile of metal - similar to black and white TVs complete with overlapping wire antennas - only cool in the 60's. The halftime show is useless. What the fuck does the sister to a child molester, Kid Rock (white trash), and other entertainers have to do with the game? NOTHING. PLAY THE FUCKING GAME ALREADY. I'd rather watch the special olympics 1,215 times in a row than watch a minute of two lame teams competing in the stupid bowl. Fuck it, as far as I'm concerned, the real super bowl was when the Colts lost to the Patriots. Fuck you Patriots and fuck you Panthers. Jake Delhomme is as gay as Jeff Garcia and so are you!

Tres: Find out what "tres" is at twelvefifteen.com

2004-01-27T14:20:00.000-08:00

» The Dr. J sex tape.

Julius Erving, aka Dr. J, one of the best basketball players to ever grace the the presence of the Philadelphia 76ers, LOVES TO FUCK CHICKS ON TAPE!

I'm so damn gald another celebrity sex tape has been released, mostly because I'm sick of hearing about that tall skinny lamp-pole shaped blonde whorebag aka Paris Hilton.

Anyone who makes home porno is cool. Anyone who makes horrible home pornos (like Dick Solomon and Paris Hilton) should be shot in the face with salt guns, sliced with rusty razors, and forced to gargle ammonia while they have cold sores. On the other hand, anyone that makes a sex tape and gives it to their wife - is a douchebag.

Before asking why this cat (Dr. J) would marry someone named after Crayola item number 02487-1 52-0033-048, let's get to the point:

EVER

Girls, should you ever, EVER, EVER know about the sex tape your man made with a girl who's probably hotter, less whiny, and most likely...performs oral better? Definitely not.

To make things worse, Dr. J's stupid cunt Crayola victim hag is raping Dr. J for all his dunkola. I swear to God, if you're reading this right now and you're married, and the slut gets half of your shit when you divorce - shoot yourself in the face and paint the walls with your brain because you're a fucking pussywhipped assclown. No woman of mine will get my stuff/money, I wouldn't even defecate in a brown bag and light it on fire for an ex. Dr. J has to pay that 53 year old shitbag a ton of money each month. It'll let you know that women are the devil and guys who let this happen to them deserve it for being such an idiot.

TURQUOISE IRVING IS AN OLD BAG OF SHIT!

FUCK YOU KLINGON LOOKING CRAYON NAMED BITCH!

[ READ FULL STORY ]

2004-01-26T14:57:00.000-08:00

» Krime is....YOUR MOM!

Eminem's slutty little mummy got carjacky-ed today, goo goo ga ga. That's fucking awesome! Hats and visors off to the teenage dirtbag that gripped her up and drug her around like a high school cheerleader. Fucking bitch has 80's hair, she deserves to get smacked around a little. Don't middleaged women know any fucking better? Obviously not. Hell, does anyone even care that his whore mother was carjacked? No. Next topic please.

» Diesel blowjob service.

Vin Diesel should be beaten like the red headed step child of two gay dads. Seriously, who's dick did this chump suck to get into Hollywood? Probably more than 36. I hate this douchebag more than I hate the fact that like five years ago I purchased the Michael Jackson double disc. Well that joke went horribly wrong; I just paid for your kids to be molested by an alien. Next.

» Back to Feminem.

G-Unit kicks ass. I'm gonna try out for the team this week so I can get my own G-Unit sneakers and condoms. Well, I don't know if my white weener can fit in the horse condoms if you know what I'm saying. Here's the rap I wrote to try out for the G-Unit. It's a one verse remix of a famous song:

check out the song and videos on twelvefifteen.com

2004-01-17T11:58:00.000-08:00

If I was a German flesh eating rocket, these are the top ten girls I would capture and eat:

Jennifer Love Hewitt: She's hot like a 16 year old Catholic school girl.
Christina Aguliera: She obviously puts out; I just hope she doesn't have a droopy meat curtains.
Philadelphia Eagles Cheerleaders: They count as one.
The nude student from "Not Another Teen Movie": She's hot and has killer tits.
Vida Guerra: 1215 Keyword: anal.
Tara Dakides: She can snowboard to the top of my pecker, and down, and up, and down...repeat. Oh, and she has a Polish tongue ring.
Liz Hurley: She always marries queers, but no one cares how smart she is. She even has a hot voice.
Trinity: Imagine a futuristic Barnum & Baily sex show...and me naked.
Alyssa Milano : Witchy whore, fuck Buffy the camel slayer.
Nikki Taylor and Claudia Schiffer: Supermodels are skinny, so two count as one - its like eating ribs. Schwing!

find out why i posted these girls....you'll be grossed out for sure: goto 1215

2004-01-15T21:02:00.000-08:00

No matter what anyone says, James Rudd is the man. He may be handicapped and in a wheelchair, but he still knows how to get sloshed and freewheel it into danger! Why on Earth would a guy in a wheelchair ride down the middle of a street in a shitty ass town called Kutztown? Because he can, and there was probably some stupid googley-eyed fat whore freshman from Kutztown University that Drunken Rudd was trying to fuck. Seriously, unless you're a stupid jock on the Kutztown University football team trying to imitate scenes from "The Program," or a piece of shit from the lame offbeat Kutztown University marching band trying to commit suicide for sucking so bad - then there's no other legitimate reason to be in the middle of a ...

full story at: http://twelvefifteen.com

2004-01-07T13:54:00.000-08:00

Hey, at least it wasn't Wacko Jacko, the previously black pop king who's transformed into the skinny version of that fat piece of shit carpet munching fuck - Rosie O'donnell, who is handling the infant. At least its the Croc Hunter. Dammit people, he knows what the fuck he's doing; if he didn't - he wouldn't do it. How many times has he been bitten or nearly stung, or nearly eaten - and has not? A bunch. I guess. I don't know...I don't watch the Cock Hunter anymore, it got stupid because he was escaping angry villian animals. That swift fucking motherfucker probably devenomized all his dangerous animals and filmed him taunting them in his backyard. Really, is it not ironic that every fucking rock he lifts, lies a rattlesnake or some other stupid thing I would probably buy, but never ....

full story at - TwelveFifteen.com

2003-12-30T02:33:00.000-08:00

Does anyone ever wonder why some black guys like fat white blondes? I do. Fat white blondes aren't hot, so what's the attraction? I tried to ask some guy on the subway the other night, but he just looked at me funny and called me a bitch. I sad sorry bro, I just wanna know why the fuck you guys like fat white chicks, and he said "what bitch?" And I asked the question again, but this time I put my hands in my pockets - you know, I don't want my fucking wallet stolen, I got high school prom pictures in there that remind me when I was seventeen and could fuck sixteen year old sluts with braces - that shit is precious. Anyway, this huge black guy approaches me on the subway. At that point I got a little nervous because I thought he was gonna smoke me like them motherfuckers on the corner that got jacked for loosing a bet over a dice game. But, to much disappointment, the overgrown bear simply got off the sub. He kept staring at me though, like he was in prison and I was a hot piece of ass that just came in over some white collar crime...like stealing all the copy machines from the office and putting them on ebay. No matter what, I survived what I thought was going to be a racially profiled beating to my early dismay - but I never got my answer. So...

full story at twelvefifteen.com

2003-12-29T19:34:00.000-08:00

Here's a few contests to have with useless animals:

Place gerbils in a potato gun. Shoot at a wall. Biggest splat wins.
Shot put rabbits by their ears. Farthest throw wins. Hopefully the rabbit dies, because rabbits fucking suck.
Set anoles loose in traffic. If your little lizard makes it across the street - you win.
Slingshot hermit crabs into the nearest lake or see if you can skip them like stones.
Punch horses in the nose or spray paint a giant penis on the side of it. I hate horses too.

full story @
http://www.twelvefifteen.com

2003-12-23T12:46:00.000-08:00

Throwing a porno party is easy. It's finding sluts that is the hard part. Well, that's until you found 1215. By following the porno party recipe I'm about to give you, there's no way you shouldn't get laid.

recipe is at http://www.twelvefifteen.com

2003-12-22T14:29:00.000-08:00

New article posted, by a FUCKING GIRL. Holy shit, didn't think I'd let this happen.

its listed @ http://www.twelvefifteen.com/articles.shtml

here is a small clip of it.....

What girls think about guys.
By: Drunk Prom Queen
After talking this over with Katie I've realized that guys are fucking stupid, and that if you place the guy stories of my friends and I in a book - it would be a bestseller with the following chapters.

1) Guys think they are the best thing to ever happen to you.
Reality check guys; Sex and the City was the greatest thing to happen to women; closely followed by Cosmo and soap operas. You'll be lucky to make the top ten.

2) Guys lie.
Why oh why do you do this? Just be honest. Seriously, you aren't going to break any hearts, and you know what? We'll respect you more if you're honest. If you lie, we're just gonna be pissed and bad mouth you to anyone who will listen. (input from 1215 - girls have big fucking mouths!)

3) Men think they are studs.
Ok, you may be cute. But you aren't that cute. I don't care who you are and I don't give a fuck if you're Brad Pitt or Ben Affleck. No guy is hot enough to put up with if they act like dicks.

4) Men think we're fragile and overemotional.
OK, sure there are always exceptions to the rules. But if you want to tell me something or do something, don't think you're catering to my needs by dancing around the situation. So if you want to go out with the boys or take a break, please spare me the 20 minute song and dance because I've got better things to do - like waxing my eyebrows or reading Rousseau.

5) Men don't know when to make a phone call.
Don't say, "I'll call you" and then not call. Just be honest. Chicks dig honesty. Just say, "listen I don't want to talk to you at this point in time, can we just end this on a good night and both keep our dignity in tact?" Rather than lying and saying ANY of these excuses, "I......

visit http://www.twelvefifteen.com/articles.shtml to read more.

2003-12-19T13:47:00.000-08:00

Wow. Saddam looks like a drunken rejected Santa. Really, he does. Check TwelveFifteen.com in a day or so when the new DNS resolves and you'll see some pics of Saddam dressed as Santa.